The End?

I got my 8th Grade Time Capsule in the mail today.
It's weird, because I thought, Wow. Eighth grade wasn't even that long ago! I remember all the things I put in here. I didn't think anything about it would surprise me.

But, boy, was I wrong.

First of all: I was a smart little eighth grader. I put a $20 bill in there.
Right?!
I know. Props to Past Kira.

Anyway. The things I can remember about eighth grade, the big highlights: they were mentioned only briefly in the letter I wrote to myself.
Everything else was about the little details, which I had forgotten already.

But those little details seemed important to me, at the time. Those things which I could not have remembered were the ones I included, the ones I focused on.

How strange, that in a moment, you can think one thing is important. Yet years down the road, even if only four of them pass between then and now, those oh-so-important things are hardly recognized, even upon retrieval.

What made me really think, was that the things I included are the ones that still apply to me: the ones that really changed me.

The most important things about my middle school life, which completely changed who I am, are the ones I have forgotten.

It's the moments that are so simple which affect you the most.
To use a psych term, it's not the flashbulb memories...it's not the LTP. Those are the most memorable, perhaps, but not the most life changing.

I made the capsule at an end: the end of middle school.
It's now the end of high school.

What I'm starting to realize now, is that everything that seems overwhelming, unbearable, or like it's a huge deal...they aren't actually defining moments in my life. The defining moments take place in secret. They don't make themselves known, they sneak themselves into your life and they don't have any sort of definition to when they start or end.

For example: becoming friends with someone.
When did you become friends?
There's no moment defining it.
Sure you met at this time. And the first time you hung out was that time.
But the actual becoming-of-friends moment? The one that matters the most?
There's no label for that. You don't know the exact moment it came to be.
But one day, you realize it's happened already. And you can't remember how or why.

It sounds weird, but it's true: the moments that change you are forgettable.