Andy.

He put his hand on the chair in front of me.
I found myself staring at it, examining it.
I noticed how they were slightly dry from the winter air, and there were small scars between his pointer and middle finger. I noticed that his nails were short but clean, and I found myself thinking about him cutting his nails every now and then. I wondered about his daily life. I thought about his hands typing on a keyboard, carrying books, holding the door open for someone behind him. I started to follow the veins up his arm, becoming aware of the person it was attached to.
I don't know whether I was tired or zoning out, but something about his hand mesmerized me. Once in a while, little things like that will catch my attention.
Sometimes it's when the girl sitting in the front of the room is idly playing with her hair.
Sometimes it's when the boy sitting next to me is running his pencil in between the wire spirals on the spine of his notebook.
Sometimes it's the boy walking to class with his headphones in, not checking the street before he crosses.
Today it was the hand I was looking at, resting on the chair in front of me.

twenty one pilots, anyone?

Nate and Tina introduced me to twenty one pilots. I bought Vessel, and I. Am. Obsessed.
Been listening to it non-stop. Every song on it is great.

I honestly can't choose a favorite to share with you, but this was the first song I heard by them. So it'll be the first you hear too.

It was snowing last night.

And I was happy.

How many hours in a day?

I look at the clock.
7:15. Time to get up.

I look at the clock.
7:50. Go to class.

I look at the clock.
4:50. Almost done with classes for today.

I look at the clock.
5:07. Should probably go do something productive.

I look at the clock.
7:30. You have a meeting in fifteen minutes.

I look at the clock.
9:42. Finish your composition.

I look at the clock.
10:01. Go to the gym.

I look at the clock.
1.22. Should probably get some sleep...

And repeat.


Don't you wish you could go some place where none of it matters?
Stop clock-watching.
Forget your obligations.
Just be.

Doesn't that sound nice?

It started out with a kiss...

How did it end up like this?

Here are my resolutions:

• Stop running away from my problems.
• Be more receptive to others' ideas and opinions.
• Don't let stress build up.
• Don't put so much pressure on myself.
• Be healthy.

Happy New Year.

2013? Let's do this.

A Christmas Carol

"Who's she?"
"Nobody important."
"Nobody important? Blimey, that's amazing. You know that in nine hundred years of time and space, and I've never met anybody who wasn't important, before."
-Kazran and The Doctor

Hello again, blog.

So yesterday, I hung out with my friend Chris.

I didn't think I'd really care whether or not I saw him again, before he left for Indiana. Turns out I did. And it was really great, actually.

Sometimes Chris got upset with me because he felt like our friendship was always serious, and we were never able to joke. I think part of that, for me, was that his "jokes" were sort of condescending...so I didn't see the humor in them.

But we were able to joke around, yesterday. We talked about words that are gross, and I mentioned that Gina thinks the word "sack" is one of them. And he told me that any name for that region is pretty nasty. Like scrotum, testicles, junk...

Yeah. Definitely no more of the CA Chris is left.

Which brings me to the fact that there wasn't any awkward tension between us. I think all this time, he had a weird boundary of being my CA and yet still trying to be my friend. But no more CA Chris, just friend. And that was nice.

I also realized that he's a good friend. 

I got a little frustrated with him towards the end of semester, and I didn't care whether or not we kept in touch. I think my subconscious decided that since he was going to be so far away from me, I better stop liking him. It makes sense, I guess. It's easier that way. Because I've had a lot of good friends move away, and that's not easy.

Distance or none, however, a friend is a friend.